The last week is one which truly tests one’s ability to carry in all weather conditions- both in the sun and rain. Is was definitely not a “very” wet week but sometimes I feel that rain always come always so at the right moment when you are outdoors, in fact on two occasions (Mon and Wednesday). Personally I don’t mind the sun but its the rain which really matters and messes up things the most, not to mention team morale. Walking with or without raincoat usually equals to wet soggy and squishy trekking boots for tens of kilometers. Even if you do try to keep your shirts and top dry to fend away from a possible cold and fever, (what else could be worst?) the onset of blisters and the inevitable foot rot will get ya in the days to come. dang…

Admin-wise, the course is coming to an end. And the usual feeling of returning stores is very much of a deja-vu for me. The happy part comes when we all as a platoon can it tops and an accomplishment, another step in NS life (which also marks an end of “a suffering phrase too”) but sadly too the departure as we course mates break back to our individual units, usually from experience, its usually quite difficult to get back together again being in separate units, with the exception of few lucky ones…

On all tests passed on first attempt all so far so good, which surfaced more headaches for me. Why? heres the story:

There had been a lot of talk going on lately on whos getting the best trainee award. Personally, my OC and even my CO came personally to give us trainees a good and motivation prep talk before the commence of last week’s exercises. One thing I noted (within the platoon) is them highlighting telling us on pushing for the best and getting what ever opportunities we have- if you work towards it. Don’t do so and you will most probably regret next time. I had been a selected as a potential best candidate in this category. Though I personally feel that (and I had not gotten such an award before) its an honor to actually get hold of that award, they glory, fame recognition and stuffs.. *duh* but all these are superficial and I feel that there is more which meets the eye…

why?

This could mean a possible big decision for me and change in my period of active serving in NS. Why? though I always long to be an officer in BMT, my perspective changed largely when I went though specialist training in Sispec and entered my unit and I am happy as what I am in now (so why am I grumbling bout this?). Well, the best trainee in my course currently have the ability to be transferred to the officer cadet school for specialised training. And opportunity I wanted to grab few months back but shunned presently now. If I accept the offer, that could mean a whole new start for me, a whole new path and area to explore in the army. But too, at the possible expense of leaving my unit and old platoon mates behind…

How can I ever forget them? I must really commend on my platoonmates support, they had been rather up lately, pushing for me to fight against other units within the course for the best trainee position. I feel that that without their support I wouldn’t have came this far. I must do something to repay them someday, even if I didn’t come out tops.

Though I can choose to reject the offer and return back to my unit and platoon as a whole and continue life from there, I guess that would be one of the dumbest thing I could do as not everybody will ever get such a a chance in life, not to mention putting everybody in disappointment and their efforts into the drain. Its just one of the choices one will face in life, not to mention the increased load and responsibly one may get as a commissioned officer.

Oh well *sighs*

Looking back, sometimes I think I think too much, counting the chickens before they are hatched. the best trainee had not been finalised yet and theres still one more week left in course when the decision would be actually made. But its good to come prepared and not make rash decisions later on. Oh well, I am looking forward to the graduation next week, hope all goes well for the final last week.

~

Would be meeting up with my friends for some army, anime and games shopping tomorrow from noon. Its just great having friends who drives, so convenient.

Currently Listening: Royksopp – Remind Me (Mix) (4:04)

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